I've realized how much I've moved on since that ill-fated day roughly have a year ago...

I've realized that I'm callused over more than I thought...

I've realized though that moments arise where I still think about her...

I've realized though that a sickly tummy-ache isn't a sign from God to break-up...

I've realized that that kind of thinking makes you slightly psycho and rather immature...

I've realized how unskilled I am at the guitar...

I've realized how much more gear I need...

I've realized that I'm so close to attaining the gear that I currently need...

I've realized how much I'm into music production and desperately want a recording studio to work in

I've realized how much I've slacked in my 8 am math classes and really need to buckle down to pass...

I've realized how much I kinda enjoy composing and songwriting...

I've realized how much I really need a job and MI isn't providing that...

I've realized that unless a girl isn't honest, she's not worth it...

I've realized that unless a guy lives the Bible and has a job isn't worth it...

I've realized that the church's way of instructing people on dating is really bad

I've realized that if Christianity is a moralized way of life then it's not Christianity but moralism and that doesn't help anyone...

I've realized that if Christian dudes would stop complaining and start being brave, it would make the world better...

I've realized how much time I've really wasted in the past years...

I've realized how much coddling and enabling many women do to the men in their lives...

I've realized how much men outside of the church are childish and are consumers which define their masculinity...

I've realized that my unsung passion is cooking Korean food and I'm getting good at it...

I've realized that though I'm single and want to be married, it's kind of nice to be alone...

I've realized that I want to be married so that I can cook dishes for my wife...

I've realized that the church needs to change their thinking about marriage...

I've realized marriage as the goal is more about leaving a great legacy than a life dream-killer

I've realized that the church does a horrible job in communicating the beauty of marriage...

I've realized that I enjoy playing the guitar...

I've realized that I enjoy teaching the Bible...

I've realized that I can't do this life on my own but I do need help with it...

I've realized that religious thinking never works...

I've realized that since that ill-fated day my faith in God's plan waned a bit

I've realized that this past year has been a battle for my soul's trust in God's plan for me....

I've realized that I'm not done with the struggle and it's getting tiresome...

I've realized that I've spent the last many weeks getting 6 hours of sleep...

I've realized that I need a way to carve out space...

I've realized just how much I wanna go live in Korea...

I've realized just how much I haven't thought of going to live in Tokyo though still would love to live there...

I've realized just how much reform is needed in the Korean entertainment industry...

I've realized how much I enjoy K-pop music more than American Top-40 music...

I've realized how much I enjoy Korean television more than American TV media...

I've realized how good The David Crowder* Band's latest release Church Music really is...

I've realized that the people I associate with is limited and I'm ok with that...

I've realized that because of the few I associate with will leave me with more room for the wife later...

I've realized that I'm actually ok with marrying a Korean girl (be that she better be cute) as opposed to just white girls...

I've realized that I'm ok with whoever I marry really just so long as she meets my standards so to speak...

I've realized that I belonged in the cowardly area of relationships but now I need to get out of it...

I've realized that I need to freaking get out of MI in order to find work...

I've realized that I can't depend on God to provide a full-time ministry job so I gotta look elsewhere for that help...

I've realized that ultimately that God is Sovereign and in control and whatever goes goes...

I've realized that people are still gonna be Pharisees with religious answers that don't help...

I've realized that if you've been brought up to vomit cliches and lived like a religous person, you'll never change...

I've realized that people who are ignorant of Christianity will remain ignorant until they open their mind to it....

I've realized that the most judgmental people of all are those who claim to be most open-minded...

I've realized that everyone has a cause they want to evangelize people with...

I've realized how uninterested in politics I am mainly because I don't know anything about it to provide good discussion...

I've realized how badly I want to be married though I'm not really obsessing over it...

I've realized that for me, God just isn't interesting in my love life and no saying can change that currently...

I've realized that a religious person would be offended by some of the things I've realized but they can go be a Pharisee somewhere else...

I've realized that experience never should trump the truth of Scripture...

I've realized that age is definitely arbitrary the older you get...

I've realized how much I truly want a Tom Anderson Atom electric guitar...

I've realized that if I can get people to give me just 3 dollars, I'd be able to get it...

I've realized that one person doesn't need to do it all, but that many people can do little...

I've realized just how much K-pop I have on my iPod...

I've realized that a Macbook Pro 15in would make music life much smoother...

I've realized just how much I truly love Apple computers...

I've realized I've got a thing for software based recording...

I've realized just how much of a gearhead I am...

I've realized just how much I truly enjoy synth/electronic/pop/rock just Owl City or The David Crowder* Band

I've realized how much I truly wanna love a woman to call my wife...

I've realized that I'm not as self-sufficient as I want to...

I've realized just how much I want to become a father...

I've realized that whenever I look at pictures of kids, I tend to get misty-eyed at the thought of being a dad...

I've realized that I'm not there yet and that's what's so heartrending because I want to be...

I've realized that I've been wondering if I'm not doing enough...

I've realized that there may be more realizations to come...

I've done a gear list of what I want in the past... but it's expanded...

this may seem like a pointless list, but it's what I'm aiming for... slowly... read if you want... move on if you'd like...

1 Tom Anderson Atom electric guitar
2 Tom Anderson Crowdster Acoustic electric guitar
1 Tom Anderson Hollow Drop Top Classic electric guitar
1 Tom Anderson Hollow T Classic electric guitar
1 Taylor 614ce acoustic guitar
1 Gibson J-45 acoustic guitar
1 Breedlove AD25 acoustic guitar
1 Martin 000-28EC
1 Vox AC30CC
1 Matchless DC30
1 Orange AD30
1 PedalTrain Pedalboard Pro
1 Keeley Compressor
1 Keeley Katana
1 Boss DD20
1 Boss PS5
1 BBE Sonic Stomp
1 Electro-Harmonix Micro POG
2 JuiceBox power supply
1Apple Macbook Pro 15in
1 Pro Tools
1 Ableton Live 9
1 Propellerhead Reason 5
1 Apple Logic Studio
1 Toft ATB32
1 Blue Bottle mic
8 Shure KSM 141 Stereo pair
6 Shure SM57
20 Shure SM58
1 Open Labs MiKO
4 Event Opal studio monitors
4 DynaudioAcoustics BM 5A
2 DynaudioAcoustic BM 9S
2 Presonus Central Station
1 Presonus Monitor Station
3 Presonus ADL600
2 Presonus DigiMAX 96k
1 Moog Little Phatty Stage II
1 Moog Voyager Performer
1 Yamaha MOTIF XS8
1 Yamaha CP70
1 Nord Electro 3-61
1 AKAI XR20
1 Roland MV-8800

that's about it for now... if someone wants to start giving to this fund... lemme know...

hehehehe...

So I may be off in my current events...

But today is Yom Kippur... a day of historical monument established by Hebrew tradition to be a day of most rememberance.  A day where the Levitical priesthood of Hebrew tradition would enter into the holy of Holies and offer a sacrifice to redeem the people of their sins and this happens annually and it is sort of a pilgramage for the Israelites to go and get the perfect sacrifice (a lamb without blemish was required for this) to give to the priest to offer to God to atone the people for their sins.  It was a long ritual but it had significant meaning.

Anyways, this is a celebration for many Jewish people to keep in memoriam...

Well... I just read in a news clip provided for me by a friend via Twitter... that...

yes this is another incident brought to you by our "good friends" the media-starved Westboro Baptist Church folk... Brooklyn is the setting... and the signs provided by the ever-so-kind WBC peeps, "God hates Jews!" "God hates Israel!" "You will eat your babies!"

Well... suffice to say... and unapologetically, they are wrong... and by wrong, they are unBiblical.  Consider that they forget the fact that God chose Israel to be the Chosen race... yes, that's right... Israel.  Not White people, not blacks, Indians, Arabs, Asians... not Native Americans or Latin folk... Israel.  Jews... people of Hebrew descent... Israel is God's Chosen people.  Jealous?  Who cares, it's not our call now is it!?  And God made His choice on what people He chose... it's the Jews, nuff said.

Well... anyways, I digress... I formally wanna offer an apology on behalf of the WBC and say that what they did as a representation of Christianity is off....  they are... and I am happy to state that they are NOT Christian by any stretch of the imagination... Sorry if their actions and stuff offended you... they are by no means affiliated with the SBC or any Baptist affliation... just because they have the word Baptist in their title doesn't mean a thing namely because their actions do not support sound doctrine, good theology, or even remote lines up with historical Baptist traditions... considering that if we all know Baptist, they have a passion for historic Christian faith and a passion to stay to true Doctrine... in which case, Baptist have been known to love the Jews (which is the call for anyone who calls themselves a Christian) and when someone who calls themselves a Baptist and hold up signs that say "God hates Israel"... we can safely say they aren't Christian...

They don't represent Christianity... they aren't Christian by any means... and if you generalize Christianity by a small tiny insignificant group of individuals who's actions are by no means Christian, then you reader are ignorant, uneducated, and short-sighted with a hint of judgmentality... So i stress...

THE WBC FOLK ARE NOT CHRISTIAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope you had a wonderful Yom Kippur Jewish friends...